My relationship. I very naively believed that would last forever until about a month ago when it came to abrupt halt.
Religion and God. My perspective on this has drastically changed for the better.
Old grudges. I made amends with two old friends last week and I physically feel lighter because of it.
Even the smallest things - for example, I never thought I was a morning person and I thought I hated spicy food and scary movies. The other night I found myself watching a scary movie, eating thai food aaand I'm pretty sure I was relatively pleasant that morning.
Everyone expected me to move back home after my relationship ended and I have to admit, for a little while I thought I was going to. I realized something though. (Well a lot of things actually.) Just because things don't go according to your plans, doesn't mean they're not going according to plan. For the first time in my life I really had the right attitude. Amidst the craziness over the last month, I was able to laugh at myself. It got to the point where I was literally like "C'mon life, just try me...I can handle it now, throw me another one." And life did. It threw me so many crazy things that the only appropriate response was to laugh.
I'm not sure what motivated me to keep trying. I just know that for the first time in my life I didn't want to give up on myself because I'd finally found something that I wanted to keep: my independence. I have a job (in fact, I got a pretty awesome promotion), I pay my own bills, I make my own decisions and my own mistakes. It's this incredibly liberating feeling to own your life. And at the risk of sounding like SJP from Sex and the City...mistakes really do make us.
Before this week, I placed entirely too much emphasis on the moments that are supposed to be important, but I was wrong. It's the moments that catch us off guard, that turn our life upside down and leave us speechless that really do something to us and really mean something...
